"Monday's child is fair of face"...and Monday it'll be, via, as Bec calls it, the express train.In the past three days we've walked all over Napa (I was convinced being that far from home would trigger some good labor), drank gallons of raspberry leaf tea, walked all over Berkeley, swung on swings and squatted daily, took in belly-laughs and spicy salsa at the movies, sweated through Indian lunches and pushed on pressure points as hard as possible... and then had a bummer of a trip to the doctor. Though I'd lost my mucus plug on Thursday and been having tons of contractions all that night, apparently they were just to grow my uterus even bigger, because absolutely no changes had happened otherwise - my cervix (sorry if this is too graphic, pregnancy makes you use these words so easily) and the baby's head were both much higher up in my pelvis then on Tuesday, not lower as they should be, and not thinning or opening any further. This, coupled with other factors, made even my own sweet, balanced OB nervous. She suggested an induction, which we had thought about, but then, when we really worked through the pros and cons, she told us that her experience and gut was telling her that trying to force this kiddo out with drugs and induced labor might be more dangerous than it was worth, and that trying to wait another week for things to kick in when by the look of things he was moving backwards, and since he'd been measuring so big and ahead of schedule the entire pregnancy, would probably not allow us a successful natural birth, either. So we were offered up a c-section. Scheduled with her on Monday at 12:30 pm. No birthing balls and amazing doula, no hot baths and chances to perfect our breathing. We will be mourning the process we'd hoped to have (I'm trying to work through it now and not save it for later...), but more than anything I'm looking forward to celebrating the birthday of my amazing baby, so happy and content with my womb that he has no desire to make a deliberate entrance. Monday it is. For real.
8 comments:
Hi there! I've been following you now and then through a link on Gail's blog, and today I wanted to chime in. I, too, was robbed of my ideal birth experience, so I understand why you are so disappointed and probably frustrated. Our daughter was supposed to be helped into the world by my wonderful, relaxed and open-minded OB in New Orleans, but instead she was born in Houston less than two weeks after Katrina with the assistance of an arcane doctor who insisted I have drugs, an epidural and an episiotomy because he "wanted to be home by 8". It was HIDEOUS, but our girl is wonderful...and in the midst of all that unwanted medical nonsense, I had to concede that she was the most important of all. I know you'll do great! Hang in there and good luck!
Good luck! Looking forward to meeting the little tyke.
OMG, Baby arriving in 3 hours!
Best of luck and health to you and the little one . . .
That means that right now you are either in the process or done! Welcome to the world little kirkbutt!
It's Monday and I'm sending lots of positive thoughts, best wishes, and hugs your way! How exciting!
Erin & Nat,
I'm w/ Liza in Boston (random last-minute detour on my way to DC I didn't have a chance to tell you about). It's Tuesday. We just read your posting from the 24th. We're envisioning you right now holding your big precious bundle and hoping that the joy he brings you helps heal your heart.
I (nicole) can't wait to see him and you both and give you all hugs for your incredible work and all the tough decisions you've had to make. I'm sending you lots of love and healing energy. xoxoxoxoxoxxo -n
Hi Erin and Nat,
Congratulations on the birth of your child. Fasten your seat belts you are about to embark on the wild and wooly spiritual roller coaster we call parenting! Well I wish I could be there to meet your child and to hang out with you and offer support but please take my well wishes from afar. And please know that there are tremendous and intense changes in this time and if you are struggling with them at all you are not alone. When Mataya was born I was filled with euphoria and joy and love completely totally unprecedented in my life before that moment. I was also in great pain and deeply deeply exhausted. I cried all the time and felt depressed. I could barely sit down my nipples felt like they were going to fall off and I don't think I brushed my teeth for about 2 weeks. It felt like a part of me had died and I didn't know who I was anymore. And all the while people kept saying to me "aren't you so happy?"
Hopefully everything is blissfully easy for you but if it isn't don't feel alone. And know that it gets so so so much easier. I am totally confident you will be wonderul parents- what a lucky kid
Love
Liza
Wow - Jason posted the minute Silas was born...how wacky! It is a joyous ride, and exhausting already, but I'm so glad he's here!
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